DeeKnow’s Grotto

Haff jast stumbled in tha door from a wee night art wit Vike having a couple a celebratory pints eh St Patricks day Guiness. We spent ta first hour off th evening convincing each other we had strong-ish gaelic ancestry, then spent the next cupla pints abusing the English fah all aff oor subsequent woes

About half way 'tu the evening we were approached by a rosey-cheeked 50-someting fencing contractor from Te Aroha who told us about hes wif who'd daied of carncer dat he'd always planned to have a night oot in Hamilton wit on St Patts day but never queet organised eet, then it toons oot he used ta do a bit a sheep-shearing arn knew 'the Woodcock Gang', especially Jack Woodcock who used ta sheer wit me Grandfather, but tat's another story...

The third hour was a challenging one. Do we stay in town or make ahh sordid way up Victoria St to hamiltons only true Irish pub, Biddy Mulligans? Turned aaht ta be arn easy decision, witin a harndful of minutes we were a few blocks nort sipping black magic out of plastic containers at de decidedly more boozy and familar Irish chaos off Biddy's arn the 17th of March.

Just before we left town we'd been jokin about dere not haffing beeen many fights durin the evening given the Irish connection and all, denn sure enough as if on cue a tatooed skin-head pushed his way tu the crowd at Biddy's, grabbed another dodgy character by da throat and da two of 'em begun trading punches while their stripper moles abused each other from a safe hair-pulling distance.

Bloody great entertainment, a little claret spilt but not enough ta disturb anyones drinking mind, in fact most folks ignored the whole disturbance as if it twasn't even happening, at all at all.

God bless the Irish!

9:30:10 PM